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I almost peed on my apron strings today. Twice.
When I ask you something while I’m not looking at you, you can’t possibly expect that you can nod and I will hear it.
Once I ring you up and have already taken your money, don’t search around in your purse for five minutes for that onepenny that [...]
Cashews are my favorite nut. Used to be peanuts, but those are so two years ago. Plus, they’re not even real nuts. Go figure.
I can’t figure out whether I like cashews because of their high salt content or because sometimes they’re shaped like tiny little man-packages. Possibly both.
Visual Aid
(These are just “halves and pieces” apparently, [...]
Actually, you can all do me several favors:
1. Don’t complain to me that you don’t have enough money. Ever.
EVER.
I’m dead serious on this. If you have more than NONE, you’re already doing better than I. You have money problems? Don’t buy anything. Period. Unless you absolutely need it. I’m talking TP and food here. [...]
Has anyone else seen this joke of a commercial where Celine Dion is lying under a Christmas tree caroling while a family of four watches on in what I’m assuming is supposed to be “wonderment” although it looked like horror?…
Because it would be absolute terror for me.
She was dressed in a slinky little red dress [...]
Yesterday I got to wander around the mall all by my little lonesome. It felt kind of good to do something on my own but I was pretty bored until I discovered the joys of free red Flying-V earrings at Claire’s. I think you might guess what I mean by “free”, though. And you’d be [...]
